What would it take for a couple struggling in their marriage to enter into fulfillment? For Prem and Herchelle Valentina Felix, it was a series of prophetic words.
By Lye Hui Xian
When dreams and reality collide
Herchelle: After marrying Felix in 2011, I believed that my fairytale life had started. But it didn’t take long for reality to hit me.
I discovered that Felix and I were poles apart. We had little time together and spent that quarrelling. Long “cold wars” were common and we drifted further apart. As Christians, we knew that God had brought us together for a purpose and marriage was a covenant. But we struggled to fulfill it.
Felix: I have always liked children and looked forward to having my own. But Herchelle was reluctant to take on this huge responsibility.
This became another issue that we would fight over. In early 2018, we could finally agree on one thing – divorce.
Herchelle: I shared with my Connect Leader that I wanted to file divorce papers and return to India. Through her recommendation, we started marriage counseling with our Area Pastor.
Felix: It was around this time when Pastor Joseph Tan preached a message on marriage. He talked about how the busyness of life could tear couples apart and emphasized on focusing on what was truly important.
We knew God was speaking to us. From that moment we decided to cast divorce out of our minds. Instead, we started working on our marriage.
Herchelle: With practical handles on how to communicate and resolve our differences, our marriage improved tremendously. I let down my barrier of distrust and began to see the good things in our marriage. Most importantly, we started to seek God as a family.
The promise of fruitfulness
Felix: At the start of 2019, God led me to Deuteronomy 15:1-2.
"At the end of every seven years you must cancel debts. This is how it is to be done: Every creditor shall cancel any loan they have made to a fellow Israelite. They shall not require payment from anyone among their own people, because the Lord’s time for canceling debts has been proclaimed." (Deuteronomy 15:1-2)
It was God’s reminder that our seven years of wilderness were over. We had entered into a season of grace and fulfillment in our marriage.
Although we had not been able to conceive all this while, we started declaring God’s truth, not circumstances. When people asked us whether we had children, instead of saying “no,” we changed our reply to “not yet.”
God affirmed His promise through His people. A friend from the choir shared prophetically that we would have a child – a baby boy. Another friend whom we had not been in touch with for years called to share the same thing!
Herchelle and I fasted and prayed for a week in elated expectation. Deep inside, I knew that God would bless her womb within the month.
Herchelle: In February, I missed my period. Scared of being disappointed, I was not ready to do a pregnancy test. But that weekend, Pastor Dominic preached a message on believing God and prayed for those who needed a miracle in the next 48 hours. That was for me!
Putting my fears aside, I decided to do the pregnancy test the next morning. The test was positive! God reminded us that His words are Yes and Amen and He is not a man that He should lie.
Felix: On October 10, 2019, we welcomed our healthy baby boy, Jeshurun Samuel. Jeshurun means “honest and upright” – a name God had revealed to my mother-in-law years ago. I’m amazed at God’s faithfulness.
Felix: God told us that He has great plans for our son. Because of this, we desire for Him to grow up in the presence of God, serving God in all circumstances. This starts by us being godly examples for him.
Herchelle: Our willingness to work out our marriage enabled God to work in our individual lives. God has restored us, our marriage, and given us a new season with a son.
If you are struggling with your marriage, don’t give up! God hasn’t given up and will not give up. Believe that He is a God of Reconciliation. Dare to hold on to His promises and believe your household can glorify the Lord!
"But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord." (Joshua 24:15)
This story was first published in Trinitarian Issue 1/2020.
Reflect & Respond:
How has God blessed your marriage? What are the beautiful things you can celebrate about your spouse this season?
Are there leaders in your Christian community that can pray with you through relationship challenges? Ask the Lord to guide you to right counsel.
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